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I think I hit a new low point in my life today. I realised, finally, I cannot have it all. Something will have to give, and the way it’s shaping up, it may be my sanity.

Clutching my only meal of the day, a can of Ambrosia Low Fat Devon Custard, served at the optimum temperature only achieved by leaving said food stuff gathering dust at the back of the cupboard since the day you left your parents, I reassessed my life. I say only meal, I had a cheeky little lunch time treat of a fluffy Trebor extra strong mint sourced from the depths of my bag in the library cafe, washed down with a mug of green tea in my attempts to trick my poor little body that I’m secretly healthy.

The pressure put on students to do EVERYTHING to try and even get a sniff at breaking into the job market following university is ridiculous. The constant social requirements to justify their degree, the reiterated comments by what I can only refer to as uneducated dicks of “lazy students that are draining government funding” do nothing for self-esteem. This, coupled with the financial burden of a degree, can only result in an unmitigated breakdown.

And before anyone says otherwise, I know you’ve seen that student in the library, exam period, 3am and sobbing down the phone to their Mum, textbook in one hand, red bull in the other, highlighters holstered and pens poised. If you’ve not seen them, well, it was probably you.

I refuse to believe this is only limited to Law students as well. Bleary eyed and caffeine-starved, I frequently find my housemates in similar states of disarray wandering round searching for a stapler or similar, essay deadline looming and sleep quickly becoming a rare treat.

Despite all this, I know this won’t stop me. I’m still going to try and achieve the grades, have the career I want, still work part time, continue all the extra-curricular things I do, still going to go out, and still try and be a normal, functioning human being. And the way I’m getting through it? Well, that would be the casual glass of Blossom Hill, specially selected to perfectly complement my Ambrosia.