clarehogarth_I would consider myself a positive person, you know, a glass half-full kinda gal and I’m frequently told how I am always enthusiastic and happy, but when something annoys me…it really gets to me. I have my opinions, and when they are formed believe me, you cannot budge them. Therefore, I thought I would spread the word on the phrases I absolutely hate when spoken and/or written on any social networks or sent by text, in the hope that I can teach the WHOLE ENTIRE POPULATION how to behave. Contrary to popular belief, just because you have changed your method of communication, it does not give you an excuse to be an idiot.
And so begins my lesson on what not to say on the internet/in person/EVER…(I would like to state before I start how much it pains me to even type these things, but, it is for the greater good, so I will pull through…)
1. ‘YOLO‘ – The first on my list goes to the disgustingly popular, yet completely moronic abbreviation that I wish never existed.
– Used by 12 year olds you have on Facebook and you aren’t really sure why, as well as older boys who like to use sunbeds and older girls who wear hotpants and stupid amounts of fake tan.
– An abbreviation of the phrase ‘You Only Live Once’, apparently thought up by this ‘Drake’ (so inspiring <33333)
– Often used to justify being an absolute idiot and doing things that aren’t okay.
– An example: ‘Punching civilians because YOLO!!!‘
2. ‘Someone pop up’ – Used on Facebook by people who are obviously incapable of starting their own conversations/entertaining themselves.
– You can just picture someone slumped on their sofa in a dark room demanding someone ‘pops up’ on Facebook. Why can’t
they start their own conversations?! The fact that they actually have to ask to be talked clearly shows they are doing something wrong, and this doesn’t help. What if someone you didn’t want to talk to pops up? What happens then?! DON’T DO IT.
3. ‘Girlies’ – Used by girls roughly aged 12-19 who use such a word to describe their friends who are indeed, of the female gender.
– I would have no problem with this word if it wasn’t for the girls who use it in a way that makes me want to curl into a small, embarrassed ball. ‘Having a glass of wine with the girlies!!!!‘ – YOU ARE 16 YEARS OLD, NOT A 40 YEAR OLD WOMAN.
4. ‘Dudette’ – Used by 12-15 year olds who think they are ‘cool’ and ‘skater’ and filled with angst.
– ‘Dude‘ is bad enough, but that is just NOT a word. No matter how many times you say it, it is not a word.
5. ‘XD, =]‘ – As much as you would like it to be, it is not 2006 anymore. These kind of things are not okay, and if you use them I WILL judge you.
6. ‘: P, ; )’ – If you use these and think you are being ‘flirty’ or something, you are not. A conversation with me will immediately stop if these are used.
7. ‘:3’ – What even is that?! Is it supposed to be ‘cute’? It is not cute…it will never be cute.
8. ‘FML’ – An abbreviation of ‘f**** my life‘.
– This would be okay if it wasn’t used for the most trivial, small problems. ‘No Coke left, had to have Pepsi FML!!!!!‘ – oh you poor thing :(:(:(:(
9. ‘What is life‘ – I have no idea where this came from or why, but apparently questioning what life is is a normal thing nowadays.
– This also would not be irritating and make me want to scratch off my skin if it wasn’t used so unnecessarily.
– ‘My dinner is cold, what is life??????’ – Yes, my food going cold often makes me practice philosophy, too.
10. ‘Random‘ – My absolute HATE for this word has stemmed from the years 2006 to about 2008.
– This word was often used, and unfortunately is still used, by younger girls who would describe themselves as ‘rAnD0m!!! =]’
– Also used to describe things that aren’t actually said adjective, eg. ‘my sox are pink n blue, rAnd0mNeSS!!!!:P’
So, friends, please take note of what you have just read and remember, if you ever use them, I will feel it, I will know…and I will not be impressed (and I will kill you)