I want you to imagine an ice lollypop left on the kitchen bench in a warm house. The room temperature slowly melting the ice lolly into a slushy mess leaving only inconvenience and a stick with a terrible joke that you’ll waste 10 seconds of your life reading. This event doesn’t take long. Yet, by the time this event comes to its grisly conclusion, there is a lot of people around that have met a stranger, got engaged, got married, pregnant with a child and divorced. OK, slight exaggeration, but hopefully you have already acknowledged what the point of this article is.
What is the rush in relationships these days?
In life, the greatest pursuit you participate in is that for happiness. The pursuit we all partake in, but we only deserve it when we’re patient. We can’t force happiness to occur. Just like we can’t force nature to take its course. So why do people think that getting engaged, married, having a child with someone they barely know is true happiness?
People seem to have lost the understanding of what happiness is. Happiness is a natural occurrence, sailing you down a stream to the river of contentment. The whole point of taking this journey is letting nature take its course. To invest your everything into another person is knowing that person inside out. Love is when their imperfections just add to the perfection you see. To know a person to this extent takes time. Happiness itself within a relationship takes time. Nature takes time. Happiness is contentment, contentment is being profoundly satisfied with all aspects of your life and relationship, anything else that follows is simply a bonus. If you are not content, being with someone who doesn’t make you content with yourself or your life that you think that having a child or getting married to them isn’t exactly going to result in happiness within its truest form? It becomes diluted, tainted with desperation or delusion. Which is all I consider anyone who rushes into such commitment with someone they barely know are either desperate or delusional although there is the odd exception. In reality though, society must learn from the majority’s mistakes including their own rather than invest faith into the luck of the exception.
Some people these days lose their patience with nature, so they try to take control of it. They are so enamoured with the idea of happiness that they believe what they need to believe, so they tend to believe that taking the relationship to the next level because they’re not content with the current location of the relationship is the best action to take. They distort their reality to fit around their idea of happiness rather than living in actual reality and working on improving the relationship before moving it forward.
I am not a judge on people’s lives; people are entitled to live their lives any way they choose. I am simply highlighting an unsettling pattern that seems to be regularly occurring. The platform of social media does not help either. Logging on to see people self indulged within their distorted reality is not an enjoyable experience.
These people plastering selfies, statuses, tweets all mentioning their other half, feeling the need to show everyone how happy they are with someone who they probably don’t even know the middle name of. Then before you know it, that same person who labelled this person they barely know their “world”, is deleting any remnants of their world off social media. And scarily enough, these people repeat that same pattern in quick succession.
People who deserve happiness are those who are either patient or honest. People don’t need to rush. People do not take such action to progress their relationship because they’re happy, they do it because they want to be happy, blinding themselves from reality and distorting their perception of happiness.
We all want love, we all want companionship and we all want someone to share our lives with. Such things of value pawned to get rid of desperation.
We all make mistakes, but it is not a mistake if it happens more than once. As human beings, we have the capacity to learn from our mistakes which inevitably, prevents us from carrying more regrets.
People get infected with anxiety when they think they should be getting married or having a baby because they’ve reached a certain age that they thought they’d have that.
Unfortunately, as much as most people yearn to be happy within a relationship, reality tends to replace their expectations simply because people thought they could plan their fate. In life, you can’t make a plan for such a thing. A relationship is a product of nature and just like we have no control over nature, we can’t make a plan for our love lives. In that respect, things happen when they should. Simply let go, let nature take its course and you will find genuine, pure happiness.