Here it is, my live recap of tonight’s Oscars. Now I can finally get some sleep.
01: 30 Aaaand here we go!! Will MacFarlane do the typical video montage at the beginning? Nope, it’s a monologue.
01:31 Yes! He made Tommy Lee Jones laugh. The only person in the world to achieve that.
01:36 William Shatner! You have to love Seth.
01:38 I’m loving these pre-recorded bits. And the part of the Boobs Song where he has mentiones Kate Winslet, haha.
01:45 Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Daniel Radcliffe singing and dancing! How can this be any better?
01:46 You just have to love Sally Field. She was hilarious with MacFarlane.
01:50 Christoph Waltz, what a nice guy you are! I’ve said so many times how much he deserved this second Oscar.
01:57 Nice bit by Paul Rudd and Melissa McCarthy doing “voices”. I’m not going to talk about awards like documentary or things like that. Sorry. I’ll just mention the big ones and the things in between.
01:59 Brave wins Best Animated Picture . Completely expected.
2:05 Yay, some Avengers are here! Where are Scarlett and Hemsworth, though?
2:10 Just to point it out, it is not such a surprise that Life of Pi has just won Special Effects. The whole movie but the kid is CGI! Oh my, they cut the speech with the Jaws theme.
2:18 The costume design of Anna Karenina wins an Oscar. That film actually has some of the best dresses I’ve seen in a period movie.
2:21 I was mistaken, no Daniel Craig for the Bond thing, but Halle Berry.
2:28 Ok, I expected more from the Bond tribute. Yes, the video was cool, and Shirley Bassey was simply amazing, but it’s not like Goldfinger is the only famous Bond song! I thought they would make a medley…
2:37 How awesome is Liam Neeson ?
2:42 MacFarlane is killing it (in the good way).
2:51 Another very expected award: Foreign Language goes to Amour. Wait, is Haneke’s wife the twin sister of Meryl Streep?
2:53 John Travolta onstage. Is he singing too?
2:54 Nope. But look! Catherine Zeta-Jones! All That Jazz!! I’m amazed right now.
2:57 Gosh, I had forgotten what a terrific voice Jennifer Hudson has. She just makes it seem so easy.
3:10 Yes, Ted and Mark Wahlberg, everyone, and Ted making orgy jokes.
3:14 Ted made a Jewish joke. I was wondering when MacFarlane would insert one into the show. Luckily, it hasn’t been a hurtful one or anything. Rather funny, actually.
3:15 Hey, a tie in sound editing (between Zero Dark Thirty and Skyfall)
3:18 MacFarlane just parodied The Sound Of Music to introduce Christopher Plummer.
3:19 And here comes the Oscar for Anne Hathaway. There is no need to bother reading the nominees… Great Plummer: “I’m looking forward to working with any of these actresses in any of my next 30 films”.
3:22 Anne Hathaway wins Best Supporting Actress. Surprise!
3:34 Here comes Adele’s first live performance of her song Skyfall.
3:35 Wow, she’s incredible.
3:48 No update so far. Minor stuff.
3:57 Doesn’t Clooney look like a grey-haired version of Ben Affleck with that beard?
4:01 Barbra, ladies and gentleman. Roger Smith would love this.
4:08 The main cast of Chicago presents an award. This edition really is a musical tribute. Points for that!
4:14 And… Norah Jones. I had forgotten that she was going to sing.
4:15 I like that song from Chasing Ice. Why hasn’t Scarlett sung it at the show? It looks amazing.
4:16 Adele wins. No big surprise, and much deserved. I like the song a lot, to tell the truth.
4:26 Of course Tarantino wins! Every single line he wrote for Django Unchained exudes genius.
4:27 Haha, what a speech, Quentin! Peace out!
4:34 Ang Lee wins Best Director? I didn’t really know what was going to happen here. Quite a lovely speech.
4:42 Jennifer Lawrence takes home the Best Actress award. OMG she just tripped over. It doesn’t matter, she’s playing it cool. Jennifer is the best (although she has her whole career ahead of her. I wouldn’t have minded Riva to win).
4:45 “Our next presenter needs no introduction”. Definitely not! Miss Streep is here!
4:48 And yet ANOTHER expected win (Meryl just said his name without even blinking), Day-Lewis. He just made History. Ok, he is being very charming and ironic, that’s good. He looks nervous. It’s adorable that he still gets nervous after three Oscars.
4:52 Um…Michelle Obama is co-presenting (via satellite) the Best Picture award with Jack Nicholson.
4:55 And Argo wins! Obvious too, but I’m so glad…
4:56 Wow, Ben Affleck has been cute and funny, and his voice has cracked at the end when he has mentioned his kids. What an example of rising, falling and then rising back again.
Great show, MacFarlane didn’t disappoint (although I missed some Family Guy references) and the Oscars were shared among all the movies. Until next year! And go to the cinema to see the movies, the experience of the big screen is much more magical than anything you can think of.
What did you think of the show?
 Brownie point if you get why I said that.